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Scifi and Fantasy Forum: Writer's Showcase: Poetry:
The Master, Drought
The Master, DroughtWe have moved to new forum software and posting here is closed!
A dawning sun with a promise Of heat For the parched landscape below. A stir of life, torn from sleep By heat From the morning's bright light. A cry of pain from a dying child Because heat Has made the crops not grow. A struggle for life through haze From heat Reflected by the dead river's might. A plea for hope from a girl That heat Has made so very old. A sigh of new found joy For heat Is lessened by the cold of night.
I liked this poem. The format adds to it, the imagery, the feel of it, it's different.
It really makes you feel what the writer is feeling
I get the feeling of a hot, desert land, without moisture or cool. I used to live in a place like that - it was described perfectly.
Nice try.Try harder next time.
Ummm...not sure what you mean King. Comments don't have to be positive, but should be constructive and explain what you don't like about the piece.
To be honest, I didn't really like the poem but I like the accent on heat.
As I read your poem my mouth went dry and the dry dusty fingers of the very drought you described grabbed me by the throat and pulled me into the poem. (in case you couldn't tell that was a compliment.
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