speculative visionscience fiction and fantasy

Hallowed Guardians

Have a great idea you want to kick around? Let's hear about it!

Moderators: Bmat, Qray

    Bookmark and Share
 

Hallowed Guardians

Postby BPRFilmz » Sat May 26, 2012 4:22 pm

Here is information on the story I want to write. Feel free to skip 'Beginnings' and 'Creation' and go straight to 'Story' if you just want to get to the actual plot.

Beginnings

In the beginning two forces existed, Power and Spirit. Everything exists in, and is a part of Spirit. Power, like a liquid is dead, but flows where it is allowed, fulfilling its purpose where ever it goes. Spirit is alive, but powerless. When the two are joined together, they become a living force.

Spirit split Power up into 5 unique powers, Light, Dark, Physical, Time and Dimension. Spirit then split itself up into five entities for each of the powers. Each spiritual being has a will of their own, desiring to fulfill the purpose of its power. They control and direct their power.

Light: Responsible for giving life to otherwise lifeless bodies.

Dark: Responsible for allowing life to escape from their dying body. Dark is the only power able to destroy. It is able to consume both spirit and power.

Physical: Responsible for the existence of everything physical, even causing the very powers to reside in physical locations.

Time: Responsible for allowing past, present and future moments being accessible. Time is a minor power, working in the background.

Dimension: Responsible for allowing extra physical space to be created, without actually taking up more physical space. Dimension is a minor power, working in the background.

The spiritual entities, known as the spiritual leaders, formed their own way of life. With their power, they created the perfect world. Spiritual life filled this physical world, while their history was recorded in time. Dimension separated this realm from the Void, where the Dark resides. The spiritual leaders are separated from their sworn enemy, Dark, as it seeks their destruction. The spiritual leaders, their world and its inhabitants were also not intended to die.

The four spiritual leaders then guided their power to a new realm, creating and governing new worlds.

Creation

Physical constantly created new physical space, but this space had to be created as it was not already there to begin with. Everywhere where there is nothing, that is the Void, the realm of Dark. Dark sent its power to fight for its territory, while Dark itself fought to get inside the realm of the spiritual leaders. As the Void is great, so is the Dark, and it was succeeding.

Foreseeing the Dark breaking through, the spiritual leaders combined their powers to lock their realm, but not before sending more spiritual beings into the new realm. The Dark was powerful, but not powerful enough to break through this lock, at least not yet.

In the new realm, Physical first sent entities to create new worlds, where they nested and nurtured their creation from the planet's core. But as war broke out, the spiritual leaders sent forth reinforcements into the new realm. These spiritual beings helped lock the realm of the spiritual leaders, and also helped secure the border between the new realm and the Void. As the physical entities and their creations were cut off from the spiritual leaders, they were forced to fend for themselves. But the aftermath of the war caused Dark to mix with many of the physical entities, corrupting them, and therefore their creations too.

As the aftermath of war was not consistently spread out, different entities were affected differently. Their creations were originally intended to be spiritual beings, but many were struck dumb by the aftermath of the war. Some created worlds that failed, some created worlds full of destruction, and some simply created meaningless worlds. Neither Dark nor the four other powers ruled the new realm, but it was in a neutral state. There remained a remnant of the spiritual beings, who were sent to aid in the battle. But they were unable to completely cleanse the new realm, so they each joined with a physical entity to help guide them in their creations. These creations, while not perfect, were made with spirits as originally intended. While the new realm was unsafe, and the creations could potentially fail, their creation was necessary. There was risk as these imperfect creations could choose the side of Dark, but it had to be done as the spiritual leaders could not hold on forever.

These newly created spiritual beings were housed in physical bodies, which were often times corruptible bodies. Like the other spirits, these spiritual beings could become one with the powers, but they had to overcome any weaknesses their physical body might have. Included in these new creations were humans.

Story

Book 1: The story follows Takuji, a normal soldier who is recruited in the fight against darkness.

The Earth has not seen battles between the powers for centuries, but a darkness long locked away will soon emerge. Two warriors from the past look to recruit new soldiers for the fight ahead. They may have died long ago, but they continued in spirit to guide others in the fight against darkness. Together they help Takuji and others master their powers.

Book 2: Servants of darkness have been locked away for centuries, but they are finally emerging.

During the current battle of Light vs Dark, Takuji's best friend, Tyler, gets mixed up those of darkness. Eventually being pulled completely into darkness, Takuji is forced to kill Tyler.

Later Takuji matches up against one of the enemies, the one who leads the servants of darkness. Takuji comes out victorious, but before his enemy is defeated, he sends darkness inside Takuji. This darkness overtakes him for a moment, but he quickly puts it off. But Takuji overlooks a parasite seed planted within him, disguised in that blast of darkness.

Book 3: There remains only a few servants of darkness left, but they must still be dealt with.

Slowly the parasite eats at Takuji from within, influencing him to use the power of darkness. After defeating another enemy, Takuji is consumed in darkness. He goes on a rampage, killing and injuring his companions. Once realizing his error, Takuji forces the parasite out of him. This parasite, inheriting the traits of a human, including the ability to wield the powers, sets off to destroy Earth. Takuji and his companions set off to take this new enemy down.

On their journey to fight the parasite, it begins to force darkness to Earth's surface. This darkness starts corrupting everything, including the entity responsible for creating Earth. Takuji and his companions fight the entity and cleanse it of this corruption, and ultimately take down the parasite. However, Takuji is lost in a pit of darkness with the parasite. He makes a promise that he will return, to take down the darkness itself.

Hallowed Guardians 2

The books are not in order, but here is a summary for the second series.

The story follows Raines. Sometime after Earth was repaired, Raines is reincarnated. He was a great warrior of Light during the first Earth long ago.

(I have not edited below this yet!)

The fourth and fifth books have a protagonist change (maybe not a good idea, but we'll see), it might be the same series or it could be the start of a second series. A new character, who I'll call Raines for now, is the protagonist. Unknown to him, others are responsible for his reincarnation. He forgot his whole past. Earth, after mass damage from earlier fights has been repaired. Time restarted for Earth, civilization went back to how things began. New characters appear, most not human. They help him to master his powers. He was once a great warrior, but at one point he switched to darkness, causing great destruction. So his good side was reincarnated.

In his journeys he comes across someone, a foe at times, but at times an ally. This being, seems to act off of instinct. With no set goal in mind, he doesn't look for the kill, but takes it if it is offered. He seems to be looking for something. This person turns out to be Takuji, who has escaped the pit of darkness.

Legend has it, when two forces struggle greatly within someone, their spirit is stripped from them. Crystallized, it falls somewhere to the ground. Spiritless, they are but a shadow of their former self. They resemble themselves, but they lack feeling. With emptiness inside, the spiritless beings search for a reason to exist (similar to characters from a certain game), remembering there was once something more. Raines finds Takuji's spirit and reaches out to him. Takuji, finding his spirit, holds it in his hand. Memories stored in this crystal ball come back to him. He remembers his former quest to fight off the darkness. He refuses to take it back though as he sees the human mind locked within as a weakness. He takes off with one important memory in mind, his promise. He promised he would take down the darkness. He now has a goal, a reason to move on.

Raines meanwhile masters the powers, and not just Light and Physical, but the others as well. The threat is beyond Earth. A struggle long ago between the powers themselves has been occurring, before the Earth existed. Raines visits new worlds, worlds of the powers too. One world he visits the inhabitants are of the power of physical. This world has many wonders, things only imagined are seen there. Many beauties, yet many terrors are on this world. Later he visits the world of Light, beings specifically able to control Light, yet, without spirits. Like a dragon, it can breathe fire, but it cannot actually harness the power of physical. Something strange happens here though, conflict awakens on this world. Light fighting light? Impossible. Life can fight death, but it cannot kill its own. After escaping, Raines is bewildered. Who could be so powerful that they could change the actual makeup of the powers? Allowing Light to be able to cause destruction. The world of light, soon consumed, the reality of things is even more put into mind.

As it turns out, the culprit is the evil side of Raines. He is working in cooperation with the escaped parasite of Takuji. While the parasite works to master the powers to unlock the gate to the spiritual leaders, Raines' evil side endeavors to fully become one with darkness. During the last battle, Takuji ponders over things. Finally, he knowing he cannot fulfill his goal without a spirit, he reunites with it. He springs into action, joining Raines and company in the final battle.

At the end of the battle, the rulers of darkness are destroyed. Peace has returned. But during the conflict, both Takuji and Raines are lost fighting against the evil. Whether they live or die is up to the reader to imagine. Darkness still resides, but it is masterless. The greatest conflict in history has been resolved. More conflicts may arise in the future, but if someone else takes a hold of the darkness, the light will be ready.
Last edited by BPRFilmz on Tue May 29, 2012 3:22 am, edited 2 times in total.
BPRFilmz
Just Registered
Just Registered
 
Posts: 4
Joined: Thu May 24, 2012 7:44 pm
 

 

Re: Hallowed Guardians

Postby Bmat » Sun May 27, 2012 6:27 am

Good vs evil is, to me, a fine plot. I am intrigued by Darkness still residing but masterless. This is a concept that might bear developing. I like that other worlds are visited. That time has restarted for Earth makes sense, especially if the population has been reduced to such an extent that they must struggle for basics of life.
User avatar
Bmat
Super Moderator
Super Moderator
 
Posts: 5782
Joined: Tue Apr 05, 2005 5:31 pm
Location: East coast US
Blog: View Blog (10)
 

 

Re: Hallowed Guardians

Postby BPRFilmz » Sun May 27, 2012 9:11 am

I'm not totally sure what you are saying, but you give some good ideas. Are you thinking I could start my story in that time period? Such as when the story starts, events could already have taken place?

This may add a new feeling to the story. A more subtle, realistic feel to it. When the story begins, the powers are already masterless (by war or they start that way in the beginning). Events could have already taken place to damage the Earth, say by human war. This would allow me to introduce darkness for the first time after peace, rather than it being an already known thing to others. It would be more of a human story without so much of the 'saving the universe' feel to it. Though, humans would still pose a great threat. The protagonist could learn of events in the past, through ancient relics that he found or something, rather than having some ancient teacher show him the way. While things would have to come up from the past, the story and threat would be more current. Not so much '600 years ago...' included. I could still include new worlds, but not so much emphasis would be put on outer world events.

Not to say I will infact change my whole story, but this is an interesting idea for sure. I don't know if you were intending for me to get that out of your message, but it is worth thinking about. If I do add the above, it could of course be controlled. Switch over to the new idea or add a touch of it in.

On a final note, I could do without the adaption of the fourth and fifth book. Those ideas were developed later on after I came up with the first part of the story. It is like a second series, it adds on to the ending of book three. I just opened a hole in the ending to point to more. I wanted more, to add another layer to the story, to add more 'extreme'. You could say they are fillers, added on to the story, but not part of the original. Both books came to mind after reading what someone said on here, that they hate stories that are a trilogy, just for the sake of it.

If I did do without the forth and fifth books, it wouldn't really hurt my story, despite which direction I take with it.

So we'll see what I end up doing, but of course, feedback is appreciated.

Thanks for the feedback, and for the thoughts.
BPRFilmz
Just Registered
Just Registered
 
Posts: 4
Joined: Thu May 24, 2012 7:44 pm
 

 

Re: Hallowed Guardians

Postby Bmat » Sun May 27, 2012 1:08 pm

Oh no, I wasn't trying to change your story. Just commenting on what appealed to me about it. Now that you mention it, I wonder if it would make sense to start more in the middle of the story for a chapter, or prologue, then go back and give the background. Don't change anything because of my thoughts. I'm not enthusiastic about battles, for example, but many people enjoy them greatly.

I admit that when I was reading your first post, I thought about the idea of finding artifacts that would indicate the events. The decimation of the human race, for example, might have been a recurring happening.

The Darkness being deceitful and cunning, yet ephemeral, maybe.

I'm just tossing out ideas. Enjoy writing your story the way you like. :)
User avatar
Bmat
Super Moderator
Super Moderator
 
Posts: 5782
Joined: Tue Apr 05, 2005 5:31 pm
Location: East coast US
Blog: View Blog (10)
 

 

Re: Hallowed Guardians

Postby BPRFilmz » Sun May 27, 2012 2:25 pm

Well your first post got me thinking. That's what feedback is supposed to do ;)

I may not lean to either direction, but may use both ideas in my story.

In my original story, it does start in the middle. A battle had already occurred on Earth, and it takes time for the history to be revealed. Some stuff isn't even revealed until the fourth or fifth book.

My story may be more fit for a video game or movie with all the action, but a book is what I am able to do and I think I can make it work. Doing free writing, I've written 3,000 words so far, but that includes events from different books.

You won't be reading 150+ pages of fighting, it will have other things too. The theme is a war, a fight for survival, but it will also show the struggle of man. The Light Bearers have to choose between good and evil, just like everyone else. Tyler slowly (realistically, it doesn't happen over night) switches sides. He is not after power, and he doesn't have a love for darkness, but he has a certain reason to even just consider the darkness. The darkness creeps in and pulls him in, he struggles but lacks the will to fight it back completely. Later Takuji is faced with the tough task of killing off his friend, once it is determined he is too far gone. This transformation occurs throughout the second book. In the other books you see the characters going through things we may go through today.

To an extent, I do like the idea of the main characters finding their own path, without the help of a teacher figure. But the downside is, it can become just luck, that they happen to find out about their ability just before the enemy emerges. I don't want luck, just like I don't want the main characters to win because the antagonists make stupid decisions.

What I do like about the current idea I have with there being teacher figures, is they are still part of the story. They aren't just going to disappear or sit in the back ground, they are a part of this struggle and face tough decisions (though, they are well established in their ways), and still have no promise of living themselves. Another positive is they can see the darkness coming. They make smart decisions by recruiting to prepare for this time. They look for others, but carefully judge to know who may use their power for good, and who for evil. Obviously they wouldn't intentionally teach someone who they thought would be an enemy, but as humans, they don't always pick the perfect candidates. Or sometimes, the person was a good choice, but they change later.

Last note, I understand that this is my story. I don't want to be wavering and unsure of myself (as I am at times), but I also want to consider ideas thrown at me.
BPRFilmz
Just Registered
Just Registered
 
Posts: 4
Joined: Thu May 24, 2012 7:44 pm
 


Return to Suggestions and Ideas

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 2 guests

cron