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Pool Area and Trophy Display

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Re: Pool Area and Trophy Display

Postby Boikat » Sat Feb 23, 2013 10:58 pm

As the Thug Squad hoisted the four up off the floor, and the suit started to beg the Highmaster for mercy, Boikat commented wryly, "For a second, I thought he was going to send us to the Mesa of Madness".

"Wait!" commanded the Highmaster. "What did the orange tabby fur covered humanoid with feline features just say?"

"He may a wry comment, tinged with sarcasm, expressing relief that they were not going to be sent to the Mesa of Madness." said the leader of the Thug Squad.

"No Highmaster! Not the mesa of Madness!" cried the suit.

"There's a Mesa of Madness?" asked Boikat.

"Yes." said the Highmaster, as he nodded again to the Thug Squad.


The crate landed with a thud, accompanied by the sounds of breaking tree limbs and twigs. Then came the sound of moans and groans as the occupants vocalized various minor injuries.

"My back hurts." said Boikat.

"My neck feels like it's broken." said Tipper'G.

"I can't feel my tail" said Maggy.

"May I?" asked Boikat.

Tipper smacked Boikat on the back of his head.

"Now my head hurts!" said Boikat.

"I don't want to die!" cried Eli.

"I think we've landed." said Tucker.

Boikat pulled himself up, looked around in the dim light and saw what looked like a handle to a hatch above his head. Reaching up, he grabbed it and turned. There was a "click", and with a sharp "Bang!", explosive bolts fired and blew a hatch off the crate. After everyone's ears stopped ringing, Boikat poked his head out of the hatch and looked around. The sun filtered through leaves and branches at a low angle. It was nearly sunset. Tucker also poked his head out of the hatch.

"I'm not sure, but I think we're in a forest." he said.

"Not sure?" asked Boikat as he surveyed the surrounding vegatation.

"Too many trees." said Tucker.

Boikat shook his head then hoisted himself out of the hatch and looked around before jumping to the ground. After he landed, he looked around again. "Looks safe." he said as the others poked their heads out of the hatch.

Tipper'G landed next to Boikat. "There's something not right here. I feel like we're being watched."

Boikat's ears were twitching. "Me too. I hear something...."

Maggy landed next to the two. "I hear it too."

Both felids ears twitched at the sound of a rustling noise. It was only a slight noise, but both heard it, and both looked to their left, and saw nothing.

"Must have been as small forest critter." said Boikat.

Maggy kept staring at the area the sound had come from. "Maybe, but I think that's where that breathing sound is coming from."

The human in the suit landed with a thud, and the two turned to look at him. Almost instantly, there was the sound of something moving through the foliage again. The two, and Tipper turned back and saw a branch moving as if something had brushed against it.

"That was no small forest critter" said Tipper'G.

Tucker landed with a thud. "I smell something. It smells like roasted turkey.


Using it's infrared scanner, the hunter studied the occupants of the crate. A display overlay bracketed the five in flashing triangular identification scan indicators. An alien script flashed as the triangles went from one to the other. Translated, the legends read, "Felid. Male. +4", "Felid. Female. +4.75", Felid. Male. 0.00", Unknown Humanoid. Female. No Data= +10". "Human. Male. -6".

The alien hunter waited until the two felids and the unknown female humanoid were distracted and retreated into the forest to analyze the data when it reached it's base camp. There, it would access a database and decide the hunt priority.

The hunt would begin in the morning.

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Re: Pool Area and Trophy Display

Postby Boikat » Sat Mar 02, 2013 7:43 pm

"The sun's going down. Maybe we should set up a camp" said Boikat.

Eli, the human, was looking around, and had gone ashen. "But you don't understand something!"

"What's that?" Boikat asked.

"This is the Mesa of Madness. Nobody comes back from here! There's something up here that hunts anyone sent here, and it kills them!" said Eli, as he continued to stare wildly around.

"Anything more?" asked Maggy.

"They say it starts to hunt in the morning, and toys with it's prey during the day before it kills in the evening."

"Then we should try to find a way off this mesa now." said Maggy.

"Or, go on the offensive, and hunt it, tonight." Said Tipper'G. "Get it before it gets us."

"This thing makes a Garthok look like a teddy bear!" cried Eli.

"The Coneheads took all our weapons" said Maggy.

"Not all" said Tipper as her eyes flashed.

"What od you have?" asked Boikat.

Tipper held up her leather pouch, pulled it open and pulled out the vial containing the stinger from the 'jello-fish'. Looking around she said, "I'm sure we can ake a stinger tipped spear before sunrise."


As the last rays of sunlight faded, Tipper held up her stinger tipped spear. "This should do."

"What's the plan?" asked Boikat.

"Tucker and Eli stay here. Hide in the crate. Boikat and I will flank Tipper, and if we see something, we'll scream." said Maggy.

"I followed you up until the 'screaming' part." said Boikat. "Let's just leap-frog through the jungle until we find something. Tree to tree. Point takes the spear, pass it like a baton..." Boikat looked up at the forest canopy. "But first, we need a lay of the land. I'll be back."

Looking at the closest trees, back-lit by the remaining twilight sky, Boikat walked toward the one that looked like it was the tallest. Jumping up, he dug his claws into the soft bark, and started to climb. Five minutes later, much to his surprise, he saw that the forest was simply a small patch of trees on a mesa. To the left of the faint glow on the horizon that marked where the sun had set, two peaks stood out against the dimly growing sky. There was another peak to the north. Looking around, he saw other mesas and spires rising out of the jungle surrounding the mesa the five were stranded on. A gleam of light in the jungle below, to the north, caught his eye. It was too far away to see, but it was not flickering like a fire, but was a steady red point. "Artificial light". he said. Once again, he surveyed the surroundings, but saw nothing to indicate there was anything else on the mesa, unless it was hidden behind the peaks to the south west or the one to the north. Slowly, he began to climb back down, which always seemed to take much longer than the climb up. At least for cat-like beings, anyway.

Once back on the ground, he told the others what he had seen.

"Then it's going to be easier than we thought." said Tipper. "We get out of this patch of trees and make for one to those two peaks. That way, we can set up a defensive possition..."

"Then what?" asked Maggy.

Then, when it comes after us, we'll be able to see it and get it before it gets us."

"Then what?" asked Maggy, again.

"Think about it. Whatever it is, it's not likely it stays here all the time. That light Boikat saw, I'd bet it was it's base. So, if it can get off this mesa, so can we."

"I'd look for the way down, then." said Tucker from the top of the crate.

Eli poked his head out of the hatch. "I agree!"

Maggy looked at Tipper and Boikat. "Or, we can simply look for a way down before the sun comes up."

"Well, the mesa seemed to drop off towards the east." said Boikat.

"No reason to waste time then." said Maggy.

"But I can't see in the dark!" said Eli.

Tipper reached back into he leather pouch and pulled out a six sided crystal which glowed. She stroked it, and the glow turned into a beam, and said, "Here, use this, and don't shine it in anyone's eyes." as she handed it to him. "We can see in the dark, but not if you blind us."

"But, if you hear something behind us, by all means, shine it in the eyes of whatever is behind us. As a matter of fact, you get to bring up the rear." said Boikat.

"But, the last guy in line is always the first to get killed in these situations!"

"Only if you are wearing a red shirt" said Boikat. "Let's get off this mesa."
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Re: Pool Area and Trophy Display

Postby Boikat » Sat Sep 21, 2013 9:39 pm

The sounds of the Green Amazon Cage Match fadded as Qray chased Merle and Nomad. "Gimme that thing!" the rogue growled. Veneno and WildCard followed, barely keeping up in their red Imperial Guard outfits.

"Nomad! Do the jingle! Do the Jingle!" yelled Merle.

"Like a good neighbor, State Farm is There, back on the Death Star!"

The five fell into a heap in the floor of the command center. A sixth person wearing a neat suit and tie, holding a clipboard commented, "Of course the liability will be astronomical."

Q groaned, "I'll take the $1,000 deductable. Nav, have you computed the course to Bob yet?"

A voice from the navigation pit said, "Yes sir!"

Qray drew his Kill-O-Zap and pluged the latest iteneration of Marlin and said, "Make it so.... Didn't I already say that....?"

The hulking space station disappeared as it fell into hyperspace.


"That's odd..." said Boikat.

"What?" asked Tipper'G.

"That." said Boikat as he pointed at a thin day-glo orange strand of some sort of wire that stretched across the path that the five had been following.

"It looks like a trip wire." said Maggy as she scanned the area.

"A day-glo orange trip wire?" asked Boikat. "Not very subtle."

"Maybe whoever set it up didn't want to accidentally trip it on themselves.." speculated Tucker.


Off in the distance, as the night grew darker, an armored being deftly leaped from outcrop to outcrop, slipped, then bounced down the rest of the mountain side, emitting a series of "Oof's" "Dammit's" and "Eeer's" as it careened from one bolder or outcrop of granite to another. It came to rest with a thud at the base of the plateau, sat up, shook it's high domed armored head, and struggled to it's feet, then staggered off in the direction of it's hidden base camp, subtlly marked by bits of bright orange pieces of trail marker tape.


Three pairs of felid ears twitched as they heard a series of "Oof's", "Dammit's" and "Eeer's" in the distance.

"What do you think that was?" asked Tucker.

"Sounded like someone falling off a mountain." said Boikat

"I didn't hear anything." said Tipper.

Boikat rapidly twitched his ears, "Vitamins."

Tipper rolled her eyes, "Okay, whatever. Let's get going."

The five moved on, carefully taking care to not trip the trip wire, the suited Yes Man being especially careful.

It only took a few minutes to clear the stand of trees that covered the top of the mesa. This also brought them to the edge of the mesa. Boikat looked over the edge.

"Nice view." he commented.

"See a way down? asked Tipper.

"If you're good at hopping and bouncing from rock to rock, maybe." He turned and looked at Tipper, "You could probably levitate down."

Tipper looked at Tucker and the human. "I might even be able to levitate those two, also."

"Levitate?" asked the human.

Maggy ventured a look over the brink. "Bolder to bolder. I'm going to need a podiatrist, aren't I?"

"Levitate?" asked Tucker.


At it's base camp, the hunter turned on it's Prey Analysis Calculator and downloaded the data it had recorded earlier. The small computer beeped and it's display flashed as it analysed the data. In the mean time, the armored hunter opened a forbidding looking upright storage locker. Inside, an array of exotic looking weapons hung on neat rows of pegs. There were rifle-like weapons, pistol-like weapons, crossbow like weapons, grenades, swords, knives, daggers, slingshots, and hand held rocket launchers. The hunter reached for a crossbow-like contraption and in so doing brushed up againts a rifle-like weapon that fell to the ground, butt first. When it hit the ground, it discharged in a brilliant burst of blue light. The ray hit one of the hand held rocket launchers, which launched it's rocket, which exploded as it hit the top of the storage locker. The hunter ducked and dove then rolled clear as a chain reaction of detonating weapons and ordinance exploded or discharged.


As Boikat bounced from one boulder to another, he almost lost his balance as a series of flashes of various colored lights caught his eye, followed by the sound of distant detonations. Maggy landed next to him and looked at the pyrotenic display.

"What the hell is that, I wonder." she commented.

Boikat shrugged. "Dunno. Don't really care. Let's keep moving." and bounded off to the next rock.

Maggy watched him leave then said, "You're the one that stopped....", then lept after him.

Tipper'G drifted down past the two, struggling to support Tucker and the human. "Nice light show. Wonder what the occasion is?"


The hunter staggered backwards and stumbled into a stack of spring loaded traps that it had cleverly pre-set for ease of placing in the path of it's prey, and discovered the folly of pre-loading spring loaded traps as the jaws of several of the traps clamped onto it's feet, then it's hands as he used them to try to break his fall, and then one particularly nasty trap attached itself to the hunter's left buttock. The surrounding jungle echoed with it's scream of agony.



"What the hell was that?" asked a frantic Yes Man.

"Don't worry about it" said Tipper as she continued to concentrate on the decent. The mental power she was expending was rapidly draining her strength. She felt herself blacking out, "Assume crash possition. Make sure your seats are in the upright and locked possition, and your tray tables are properly....stowed..." Then she passed out.

The three fell only about twenty feet. The human landed with a thud and an explitive, Tucker hit then sprang to his feet and looked around in confusion. Tipper hit and rolled, her arms and legs flailing limply. When she stopped, she did not move.

Tucker looked at her, "Tippa? Tippa?" There was no answer. Tucker grabbed the end of his tail and started sucking on it. The human pulled himself up and looked around and saw Tucker and the un-moving Tipper. Pulling himself up, he limped over and looked at the Dark Elf and gently poked her with his finger, "Tipper? Tipper?"

Tipper moaned. "Not tonight Boikat, I have a head ache. Besides, the marsh mellons havent bloomed yet."

"Tippa! Wake up!" implored Tucker as he looked around nervously.

Tipper's eyes fluttered, then opened. "Why do I feel like I've been eaten by a bugblatter beast, then regurgitated?"

"I don't know, but you passed out and we fell." said Tucker.

"Did I live?"

Boikat saw Tipper, Tucker and the human suddenly fall, and started taking longer leaps. Maggy saw Boikat taking longer leaps, then saw the other three hit the ground and followed Boikat's lead. In seconds, they landed next to Tipper, Tucker and the human. Maggy was asking if she was still alive. In the background, yowls of pain could still be heard echoing through the jungle.


The hunter gave another scream as it pried the last of the traps off of it's leg. Tossing it aside in disgust, it turned to stride purposfully to retrieve whatever weapon had not been destroyed when the armament locker exploded, and walked into the trunk of a sturdy tree. There was a loud "clunk" followed by a "thud" as the hunter was knocked out by the impact and dropped like a sack of potatos under a two-gee gravity field.




Veneno said nothing, but stood with her arms crossed, drumming her fingers on her upper arms.

"Oh, okay." The rogue holstered his Kill-O-Zap as maintenance droids cleaned up the scraps of the last Marlin robot. looking slightly rejected, he walked over to the ledge that overlooked the Nav station.

"Are we there yet?"

"No sir."

Are we there yet?"

"No sir."

"Are we there yet?"

"No sir."

Are we there yet?"

"No sir."

"Are we there yet?"

"No sir."

"Are we there yet?"

"No sir."

"Are we there yet?"

"No sir."

"Are we there yet?"


"Sorry. It's all this tedious mucking about in hyperspace. It sort of gets to me at times.." said Q.

"I can fix that!" said Nomad.

"NO!" said Merle, Veneno, WildCard and Qray at the same time.

A voice sounded from the Nav Pit, "Sir. We've arrived at Bub."

"Bub? What's 'Bub'? Where's 'Bub'? Who said 'Go to Bub'?"


Planet: Beta Ursa b
Mass: ;98 E
Habitability: B-
Population: 1.3 Billion human colonists primarily from Northern Europe, 500 years.
Moon: None
Climate: Avg temp= 65F, frequent precipitation


Qray looked at the viewscreen and the info overlay. "Looks dreary. Nav! Reset the nave comp and take us to Bob. That's B O B. Not 'Bab', 'Beb', 'Bib, 'Bub, or sometimes 'Byb'. Bob, not Bub. Make it so!"

The voice from the Nave Pit said "Yes sir!"

Qray waited a few seconds. Looked at his fingernails, studied the ceiling, then said, "Well?"

The voice from the Nave Pit said, "It will take a few hours for the Bachman turners to drop out of overdrive to re-synch with the Tina turner."

"Argh! Marlin!"

A brand new droid appeared, "Yes Commander?"

"Ready a shuttle. With a population of 1.3 billion humans from Northern Europe there has to be a decent beer garden down there, and I plan to find it! A few hours ought to be enough time to find it and get plastered..."

"As you wish." said the droid.

"Pretzels. Need to stock up on Pretzels, too." said Merle.

"And some genuine bratwurst too!" said Nomad.

Veneno shook her head. "Welcome to the 'Eternal Octoberfest'."

"One can only hope." said Qray with a grin.


"So, what do we do now?" asked the Yes Man.

"There has to be a way off this rock, and we find it." Boikat looked at the human. "You know more about where we are than the rest of us. Anything useful?"

"The mesa is on a island, and there's an airport on the west coast. It's where they drop off the crates of prisoners before they drop them off on the mesa."

"Anything there that will get us into orbit and to the spacedock?" asked Maggy.

"There might be, I don't know." shrugged the human.

"Well then," said Boikat, "we should go and find this airport. This island didn't seem to be too large. I don't recall seeing any sign of an airport when I was in the tree tops on the mesa, though."

"Oh, it's there," said the Yes Man. "The High Master officiated it's opening, and I was with him at the time."

"Brown noseing" asked Maggy.

"Providing positive feedback to the High Master." said the Yes man.

"Like I said..."

Boikat looked at Tipper and asked, "Are you okay to travel?"

Tipper stood up and grimmanced, "Only as long as it's on foot. I'm exhausted and my left knee is killing me."

Boikat went over and took her left arm and pulled it over his shoulder, "I got'cha babe." and nuzzled her left ear.


Q took another glance at Veneno and WildCard. "Where did you find genuine Barvarian Bar Wench outfits, and why didn't I know about them sooner? They look much better than those red robe things."

"You mean because of the low cut neck line?" said Veneno.

"I wouldn't even call them 'neck lines'. And what do you mean 'find them'? I heard you specifically tell Marlin 'low cut Barvarian Bar Wench outfits!" said WildCard in an accusing tone.

"Oh? You heard that?" asked the rogue in mock innocence.

The shuttle buffeted slightly as Merle piloted it between towering thunderheads. "Lot of storm activity, planet wide, but I think I've locked onto a beacon of some sort." He checked the DME, "Ten miles out so prepare for landing."

"I can almost smell the bratwurst now..." said Nomad.

"...served on a bed of sauerkraut..." said Merle.

"....and beer!" said Veneno.

"Ven!" exclaimed WildCard.

Veneno shrugged, "One thing I learned is that when the boys are on a roll, you might as well enjoy it."

WildCard looked skeptical.

"It's a beer-fest. What could possibly go wrong?"

"If those aren't 'famous last words...' I'm declaring myself the designated driver!" said WildCard.


Boikat peered around the trunk of a tree. "Mmmmmmm..... Airport...." then turned and went back to where the others were hiding deeper in the jungle.

"There doesn't appear to be much to choose from." he said.

"Well, this is off the beaten path, so to speak" said the Yes Man. "As far as I know, they only use it to drop off condemned prey. Occasionally, cargo atmo-ships stop here to refuel on a long hop..."

"How 'occasionally'?" asked Maggy.

As if in answer, they heard a low rumble and looked up. A large aircraft appeared through the foalage.

"That's one now!" said the Yes Man.

Boikat was unimpressed. "I don't think that will get us back to the Eldorado."

The yes Man slapped himself in a gesure commonly called a "face palm".

"Guys! We're forgetting something!"

Three pairs of eyes looked at the human. The odd pair out was studying a fuzzy worm of some sort that was inching it's way up a twig.

"What are we forgetting?" asked Boikat.

"We're off the mesa."


"That means we're free." said the Yes Man. "We can walk into the terminal and demand the Right of Return! They have to take us where ever we want, including, back to your ship."

"You mean we don't have to steal a ship, or sneak around in the shadows?" asked Boikat. "Where's the fun in that?"


The shuttle folded it's wings into landing configuration and set down at what appeared to be a small air/space port of some sort. As soon as Merle opened the main entry hatch, Qray bounded down and looked around, inhaled a deap breath of air, then pointed off to his left. "That way!"

Before he could leave, a man came runing from a nearby building which was no doubt the air/space control facility.

"Excuse me! Excuse me!" he yelled. When he was within reasonably close talking distance said, "Excuse me, but all visiting aircraft or space craft must check in and pay a parking fee!"

"Can't we just pay when we leave?" asked Qray.

"No. That's the oldest con in the books. Parking is 500 Standards." said the Port Master.

"Okay. Marlin. Pay the man!" said the rogue, and started off. The others followed at a fast walk, leaving a confused and expectant Port Master looking at a robot that didn't have the foggiest clue as to how to "pay the man".

As WildCard followed the group, she studied the buildings, their architecture, decorations, everything. "Interesting..."

"What?" asked Q as he paused and sniffed the air again.

"Bratwurst!" exclaimed Nomad, and pointed in the same direction Q had been leading them.

"No." said WildCard. "Look at the names of the shops and eateries."

"Wolf Hollow Inn" "Wolf Hollow Bar and grill". "Wolf Hollow Alterations" "Hair of the Wolf Den" "Wolf Hollow Hardware" "Wolf Hollow Livery and Tack Shop" "Wolf Hollow Blacksmith", and so on.

"So, the town is called 'Wolf Hollow'." said Qray. "The important thing is finding the 'Wolf Hollow Beerfest'!" Q stopped and held up his hands, "Quiet! Listen!"

The faint sound of an "Umpa" band could be heard.

"A polka! We're getting warm!" said Merle.


Five figures, led by a human, strode out of the jungle.

The five walked confidently past the eyes of port workers and security guards that only stared at them in amazement.

They waked right up to themain administration building, and didn't break a step as they walked through the front door, and up to the reception desk.

"We have surived the Mesa, and demand the Right of Return!" stated the human.

The receptionist looked at the human, then at the three felids and the dark elf, looked back at the human.

"That is a deceptive statement. Nobody survives the Mesa of Madness. You should be emotionally ashamed and embarassed."

The yes man hught a second, "So, where did we come from?"

The receptionist looked blank for a second. "Allow me a few moments to verify your claim. Please stand there and do nothing." The receptionist tapped a display and studied it's screen. "This is most unusual, and has never happened before. I need a few moments to retrieve the appropriate paperwork that needs to be filled out in triplicate, and filed with the authorities.
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Re: Pool Area and Trophy Display

Postby Boikat » Thu Oct 10, 2013 9:15 pm

It was like watching an assembly line. One clerk picked up a form and laid it in front of Boikat. Boikat signed it and handed it to the next clerk, who tore one copy of the three page form off then handed it to another clerk, who tore off the second sheet, then handed it to another clerk, who, like the others, placed it into an "Out Basket". This happened five times.

Then the first clerk placed another stack of forms on the counter, and handed a form to Boikat. And the processes repeated six times.

Finally, the first clerk looked at Eli and said, "Please state your destination."

"Orbital space dock" replied the human.


Q wiped a tear from his eye. "Look at it! Beer, ale, beer wenches, wine, vodka, beer wenches, more beer, roast pig, beer wenches......"

"And Pretzels!" said Nomad.

"Cold damp drizzle..." said Veneno, noting the weather.

Q looked up at the sky, "Looks like the clouds are breaking up a bit. Look, I can see the Death Star III."

The others looked up and saw a grey-metallic crescent "moon".

"At it's current orbit, it should grow to a 'full moon' in a few hours.."

A beer maid that was passing by gasped, "Do not say such things. A full moon is a bad omen!"

Q looked puzzled. "Since this planet doesn't have a moon....."

"It's a legend" said the maid, "But we do not speak of such things. It is said that the light of a full moon causes great evils to happen!"

Q looked more puzzled and pointed at the orbiting station. "Still, not a problem, since it's not a moon.

The maid looked at what Q was pointing at, gasped, dropped her tray of beer tankards, shrieked, and ran away. Other beer fest locals looked around, then up, and seemed to all go into some sort of "panic" mode. They gasped. They made odd noises of surprise and fear. Then they ran away. The mass hysteria spread, and soon the beer garden was deserted, except for Qray and company.

"What got into them?" asked Merle.
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Re: Pool Area and Trophy Display

Postby Boikat » Wed Oct 23, 2013 10:47 pm

Maggy stepped over the moaning form of a Conehead security guard. "...think you can tell me I can't board my own ship?'

Tucker, Tipper, Boikat and the human followed. Eli paused and bent over the guard and said "Sorry for the inconvenience..."

"Eli. In or out?" asked Boikat.

Eli looked at the three other guards, who seemed to be regaining their composure after seeing their captain disabled in the blink of an eye. Turning, Eli entered the airlock and squeaked, "I'm in!"

Boikat hit the "Close" button and said to Tipper, "Remind me to strike 'Return to Remulak' off my 'Bucket List'." The two followed the others.

When they got to the Eldorado's bridge, Maggy started flipping power switches, powering up various systems. Once seated in the pilot seat, she checked the main system status display. All systems were green. Maggy tapped the com panel of the armrest, "Remulak Control, CS 907, Eldorado requesting permission to detach and depart, over."

There was a moment of silence, then, "Negative on departure. You have failed to pay your docking fee. Please power down your maneuvering thrusters and remit payment."

"Roger, detaching and departing. Thank you." Maggy applied full reverse maneuvering thrust and the Eldorado groaned as it fought against the docking clamps. With a sudden lurch, the docking clamps sheared off and the Eldorado broke free of the dock.

"Mepps! Mepps! That was not authorized! Please power down and..."

Maggy flipped off the com. "Hold on kids...." then switched from maneuvering thrusters to the Eldorado's main sub light systems, used for interplanetary travel within as star system. The cargo ship lurched forward and began to accelerate as Maggy pulled back on the control column. The Eldorado nosed up and cleared the dock as it accelerated. A side screen flashed and showed a display with a green dot in the middle with four red dots moving towards it."

"Hold on." Maggy said again, "Sky cops. Hold on for Hyperjump."

Boikat gripped the edge the console he was standing next to and winced as the hyperjump drive kicked in.

"Well, this should be interesting." said Maggy.

"What?" asked Tipper.

I didn't have time to enter a destination, just a range of ten light years."

Eli pulled himself to his feet. "What does that mean?"

"That," said Boikat, "means we can pop out of hyperspace anywhere within a ten light year sphere from our point of origin. Maybe even inside the heart of a red giant star."

Eli went pale. "Inside a star?" The human's eyes rolled up and he dropped to the deck in a dead faint.

"When he wakes up you should point out to him that the odds of that happening are several billions to one against, given the emptiness of space." said Maggy.

"Why?" asked Boikat. "He's a Yes Man."

"Which begs the question; Why bring him along? There was a time when you and Q would shoot Yes Men on sight." said Tipper.

"I figure as long as we keep him away from politicians he's harmless and, if the need arises, expendable." said Boikat.

Maggy turned and looked at Boikat "Expendable?"

"Hey, you never know when you might need a scape goat, or offer up a sacrifice on some alien planet in honor of some vague local custom..." Boikat said with a shrug.

Maggy shook her head. "You're weird."

"You have no idea..." said Tipper.
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Re: Pool Area and Trophy Display

Postby Boikat » Sat Oct 26, 2013 12:08 am

"Dropping out of hyperspace" said Maggy. The Eldorado lurched back into normal space/time.

Boikat walked over to the human and gave him a small kick in the ribs.

Eli groaned and opened his eyes. "Where are we?"

"Just out of hyperspace." said Boikat, then he added, "It might start to feel a little warmer in a few moments..."

Eli's eyes snapped wider, "We didn't end up in the middle of a star, did we?"

"If we had, we would never have known it. We would have been vaporized in a millisecond." said Boikat with a slightly sadistic grin.

"Good to know." said Eli.

"On the other hand, 'Where are we?' is a good question." said Tipper.

Maggy finished reconfiguring several flight systems and said, "It'll take a few minutes for the navcomp to get a fix. It has to get a fix on several pulsars and match them to the standard pulsar map, then computer our position." She tapped a few controls and the main screen displayed an external view. "We did manage to drop into a star system though. Orange dwarf star, at least ten planets. No habitable planets though. Just gas giants and frozen hunks of rock."

Tucker interrupted, "Ummm, Muggy, red lights. Flashing red lights." He pointed at an indicator panel. Maggy and Boikat went over to look.

The flashing red light indicator was labeled "Main AL Seal".

Maggy muttered a curse, "Must have been damaged when we left Remulack." Tapping the console, she called up a diagnostic menu and tapped a few more keys. "Yup. Ruptured seal. Possible damage to the frame."

"That's not so bad. We should be able to get that fixed after we find out where we are then go to the nearest planet with a space port." said Boikat.

"Not really. There seems to also be damage to a valve. We're losing air. We need to set down somewhere and fix that bit at least." Maggy went back to the main console and checked the data on the stars system. "Closest piece of rock we can land on is the tenth planet of the system. Wear your long-johns, it's frozen ball of mud.... or frozen something. Reading are odd, but it will have to do."

An hour later, the Eldorado fell into orbit around a ringed brown planet that also had several fresh impact craters.

"Looks pretty smooth. Easy-peasy landing." commented Boikat.

"Odd luster, too." said Tipper.

"Sight see later. Prepare for landing." said Maggy.

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Re: Pool Area and Trophy Display

Postby Boikat » Tue Feb 11, 2014 12:43 am

Maggy gently eased the Eldorado down on a flat frozen plain of dark mud. As soon as the ship gave a final small shudder, Boikat stood up and said, "I guess I'll get started on the repairs..."

Maggy looked at him and said, "Not so fast. Keeping this tub running is Tucker's job."

"Tucker?" Boikat looked puzzled.

"Don't let his appearance fool you. When it comes to fixing, he's the best. Just stay out of his way."

There was a clang as Tucker opened a locker and pulled out an EVA suit and a tool case. Maggy moved over and started helping Tucker done the suit. Boikat noticed that the locker contained several other EVA suits.

"So, okay. Is it okay if I poke around outside a bit while Tucker is working?"

Maggy looked at him as she pulled some straps tight. "Don't wander off. Keep the ship in sight. This rock looks lifeless, but that doesn't mean it is."

Boikat gave Maggy a half-arsed salute, "Arrr, Capt'n.", then turned to Tipper. "Up for a stroll?"

Tipper looked slightly annoyed, then said, "Might as well. Who know, there may be some nice crystals laying around..."


The airlock opened, accompanied by a wisp of air and water vapor that quickly condensed then vanished into the airlessness of the frozen planet. Boikat looked at Tipper, then hopped out of the lock and fell slowly to the surface, landing with a bounce in the low gravity. Tipper followed and landed next to the felid. The two looked around and saw a landscape composed of a smooth surface that had an almost wax-like appearance. "I don't think I've ever seen anything like this before" said Boikat.

Tipper knelt down and looked closer. "Neither have I." Looking up she said, "That looks like an impact crater over there. Might be a good idea to take a look at it."

Boikat nodded and the two hopped towards the feature. The low gravity allowed them to cover twenty yards per leap, and the two landed next to the rim of the small crater after only a few bounces. The area surrounding the crater was covered by the expected layer of fragmented rock. Tipper picked up a piece and looked at it. "Looks like brown wax..."

"Just our luck. We stumbled upon a planet made from the sanitation dumps for every luxury star liner in this part of the galaxy." said Boikat.

Tipper rolled her eyes. "Is that your professional opinion?"

"No, that's my immature, unqualified and childish attempt a humor."

Tipper shook her head, "That might pass the smell test."

"Was that more toilet humor?" asked Boikat. "All things considered, it works." he said with a grin.

Tipper opened a belt pouch and pulled out a sample bag. "Whatever this stuff is, the whole surface seems to be made of it. My curiosity is peeked." Tipper opened the bag and dropped the small pebble into it, then gathered a few more and dropped them into the bag, too.

Meanwhile, Boikat peered over the rim into the crater. "More of the same. Maybe it is all frozen mud of some sort."

The radio in the helmets beeped, "Boikat, Tipper. Tucker said he's almost finished. Head back to the airlock."

"On our way" said Boikat.

There was a hiss of gas as the lock filled with air. Tipper set down the bag of rock samples as Boikat watched the pressure gauge. As the readout turned green, Tipper reached up and unlocked the visor to her helmet. Boikat did the same but before he could release the latch, Tipper's eyes went wide and she slammed her visor shut again, "No! Wait!"

Boikat froze and said, "What?"

"Strange smell!" They looked around the airlock. "Good seal, noting snuck in with us..." said Boikat.

Tipper picked up the sample bag. "Damn! The seal to the bag isn't closed all the way."

"If we die from some sort of weird poisoning, it's gonna be your fault!" said Boikat.

Tipper started to send a barbed retort, then stopped and looked puzzled. "Wait a minute. I've smelled that smell before." Gingerly, she opened her helmet visor again, and took a quick sniff of the sample bag near the open seal.

"I don't believe it!" she exclaimed.

"Believe what?"

Tipper didn't say anything, but instead, opened the bag and took a small rock from the bag, sniffed it again, then popped it into her mouth. Boikat's jaw dropped, "Are you nuts?"

Tipper didn't answer, but instead seemed to be rolling the rock around inside her mouth, and slowly a grin formed on her face. She reached into the bag and pulled out another chunk of rock, and again, popped it into her mouth. "Heavenly!" she exclaimed.

Boikat still stared at her, gap-jawed. Finally he managed, "Tipper, are you all right, or have you mutated into some rock-eating mutant that eats rocks?"

"You're not going to believe this! Chocolate! Milk chocolate!" Tipper said as she popped another chunk of rock into her mouth.


Elsewhere in the galaxy....

Two shoppers walked down the isle of a food court. One stopped and looked at a sales display. Her companion, another woman sighed. "They call that a special price?"

Her companion said, "Well, it is half price."

Special Price!
Limited Time Only!
16 oz pure milk chocolate!
Only $1600.00 (plus tax)

The two looked at the items on the sale rack, then wandered off to look for something they could afford.
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Re: Pool Area and Trophy Display

Postby Merle » Thu Mar 06, 2014 12:03 pm

Meanwhile back in the PATD, Merle looked around the empty bar. Then he looked at Cloney. "A round for the house, on me, in honor of Deslock Darkstar's birthday!" Cloney rolled his eyes.

"Hey, I'm not cheap. It's not my fault the place is empty."

Happy Birthday, DD! Hope it's a good one!
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Re: Pool Area and Trophy Display

Postby Bmat » Thu Mar 06, 2014 8:13 pm

Happy Birthday, DD! Thanks for the lemonade, Merlie!
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Re: Pool Area and Trophy Display

Postby Ariel » Thu Apr 10, 2014 12:17 am

Some very entertaining writing there Merle! :)
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Re: Pool Area and Trophy Display

Postby Merle » Thu Apr 10, 2014 12:54 am

I think you mean Boikat. ;)
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Re: Pool Area and Trophy Display

Postby Boikat » Thu Jul 24, 2014 7:39 pm

Amid a growing chorus of howling, five non-lycanthropes mad a mad dash for the space port. Marlin turned as the crew rushed by, then turned back to the space port official, and noticed his nose was longer and pointier, and there was something going on with his ears. Then it started to growl. Marlin turned and followed the humans into the shuttle, or rather tried to.

WildCard glanced behind, "I guess there will be a new Marlin on the station..."


"Chocolate. A whole planet coated in chocolate" said Tipper.

"It must be some sort of funky quantum physics thing." said Boikat.

"What do you mean?" asked Tipper.

"Given an infinite universe, anything is possible, including a sufficiently large clustering of atoms and molecules forming a large mass of chocolate."

Tipper looked skeptical, "You buying that?"

"Nope! But the only other possibility is that mega-tons of chocolate has been dumped here on purpose." said the felid. "Maybe Maggy can load up a couple of tones. Probably worth billions."

The two were interrupted as Maggy opened the inner airlock hatch, "What's the hold-up? I want to get off this rock as soon as possible."

Boikat held up a chunk of brown rock, "Chocolate. Tons and tons of chocolate."

Maggy looked at the rock, then back at Boikat.

"Tons of chocolate?"

"As far as the eye can see..."

Maggy looked like she was thinking, then said, "All the more reason to scat. It's always been rumored that a lot of high priced commodities have been hoarded, chocolate being one of them. That also means that whoever is hoarding wants their hoard hoarded to keep the prices higher, and will not stop at anything to keep their hoards location secret, including blasting anyone that might stumble onto the hoard."

"So, no chocolate mining?" asked Boikat.

"Are you kidding?" asked Maggy. "If we use the cargo skip-loaders, we should be able to scrape up at least 100 tones of chocolaty milky goodness in about an hour, and be gone. That much chocolate sold on the Orion Arm should be more than enough to cover the loss from being ten years late on this cargo run! Lets get too it!"


Two hours later...

Maggy studied the scope. Six red dots were closing in on the Eldorado. The com panel speakers crackled, "Unidentified ship, this is the HCC destroyer, 'Gotterdammerung'. Heave to and prepare to be boarded."

Maggy looked at Boikat, "Status?"

"Stall them for another minute or two, the hyper core is still spinning up."

"Gotterdammerung, the is the independent cargo ship 'Eldorado', what does 'HCC' stand for?"

"Hershey Chocolate Company. Please comply with my instructions, of we will be forced to disable or destroy your ship."

"Why?" asked Maggy, as she glanced at Boikat.

"Just a few more seconds." said Boikat in a whisper.

Screens on the bridge flashed. "That was your only warning shot. The next will be for the kill. Please shut down your star drive and heave to!"

Maggy glanced at Boikat again. "Ready!"

Attention HCC Gotterdammerung: Bite me." then she hit the Hyper Drive control.

On board the Gotterdammerung, the ship captain looked at the tactical officer, "Tracking."

"Locked, but....."

"But? But what?"

"The tracking broke almost as soon as they went into hyper drive."


Tipper looked strained. Sweat ran down her forehead as she strained to maintain a dark spell she had cast over the Eldorado.

"Just a little longer..." said Maggy.

"Boikat looked up from his navigation screen, "We should be in position..... now!"

Tipper'G let out a sigh and looked like she was about to pass out, "I'm not going to ever do that again! At least, not to hide an entife ship from the rest of the Universe, anyway."

"Good thing tech doesn't handle magic." said Boikat.

"New course plotted..." said Maggy. "By the way, where's the human?"

Down in the cargo hold, Eli continued to take several more samples of the one-ton blocks of chocolate. Quality assurance tests.
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