Chrysalis

[rayjones]

Chrysalis

Emerald caverns carved in light, honeycombs of sheer delight
And I, a joyful wonderer be, in this labyrinth of mystery
One mere step through fern and brier, to satiate my soul’s desire
Streaking through the leafy crown, blades of gold slicing down

Rippling patchwork; gold and gray, a living carpet of dark and day
While all around the forest sings, angelic songs on bluebird’s wings
Golden ribbons shimmer through, the leafy dome and my heart too
Passing through daylight’s streams, sailing through my fondest dreams

Near teary eyed I look and see a deeper dream than where I be
Can scarce restrain my flying heart, as where I am more truths impart
Words whispered by the balmy breeze, laced with loving gentle pleas
Whom I wonder shares my dream, who else now plies this mystic stream

“Here I am, come and see,” Her voice a soothing melody.
My pace I quicken I strain to see, whom it is that calls to me
My heart pounding as I run beneath the foliage splintered sun
My feet leaden blocks of clay, my mind fearing I’ll lose my way

There draped against an ancient tree, her silky form I finally see
Her fingers curl around the trunk, from my flesh my soul has shrunk
A slack balloon inside a glass, she reaches out until I pass
On wings that gently part my skin, my new life I now begin

Something crumples to the ground onto the place my body’s found
Not looking back I ride the light, my wings unfurl and I take flight
Her eyes aglow like golden orbs, her magic love my souls absorbs
Our souls in twined with golden beams as it fulfils our fondest dreams

Our will; bright wisps that surfs the breeze, we come and go just as we please
So now you know from where we birth, how fairies came to be on earth
If you ever hear the call maybe you’re not human after all
See the tear across my spine and dare to want this fate of mine.

[Bmat]

It is charming. I liked it!

If I may, I'd recommend some cleaning up of the rhythm, the rhyme and rhythm are so strong in most of the poem, that it would be fun if the rhythm held all the way through and didn't stumble in the few places that it does.

[rayjones]

Thank you so much for reading it and you're quite right the rhythm is inconsistent-something I need to work on thanks again Ray.

[Bmat]

(My pleasure.)

It occurred to me that I should add that a departure from the rhythm could be a device for emphasis of a certain point, - something to slow down the reading and make the reader pay particular attention to something that is being said. It would seem desirable that this would be clear and would not be mistaken for a simple straying from the rhythm.

(I don't like to critique poetry since it is so much part of the poet. )

[Ariel]

Filled with imagery and eloquence! Loved this one!!!!

[rayjones]

Thank you I wrote one morning just before I headed off to work,a little mental pacifer to get me through the day. Ray