"I lay on my straw, but I could not sleep. I thought of the
occurrences of the day. What chiefly struck me was the gentle
manners of these people, and I longed to join them, but dared not.
I remembered too well the treatment I had suffered the night before
from the barbarous villagers, and resolved, whatever course of
conduct I might hereafter think it right to pursue, that for
the present I would remain quietly in my hovel, watching and
endeavouring to discover the motives which influenced their actions.
"The cottagers arose the next morning before the sun. The young
woman arranged the cottage and prepared the food, and the youth
departed after the first meal.
"This day was passed in the same routine as that which preceded it.
The young man was constantly employed out of doors, and the girl in
various laborious occupations within. The old man, whom I soon
perceived to be blind, employed his leisure hours on his instrument
or in contemplation. Nothing could exceed the love and respect which
the younger cottagers exhibited towards their venerable companion.
They performed towards him every little office of affection and
duty with gentleness, and he rewarded them by his benevolent smiles.
"They were not entirely happy. The young man and his companion
often went apart and appeared to weep. I saw no cause for their
unhappiness, but I was deeply affected by it. If such lovely
creatures were miserable, it was less strange that I, an imperfect
and solitary being, should be wretched. Yet why were these
gentle beings unhappy? They possessed a delightful house
(for such it was in my eyes) and every luxury; they had a fire to
warm them when chill and delicious viands when hungry; they were
dressed in excellent clothes; and, still more, they enjoyed one
another's company and speech, interchanging each day looks of
affection and kindness. What did their tears imply? Did they
really express pain? I was at first unable to solve these
questions, but perpetual attention and time explained to me many
appearances which were at first enigmatic.
"A considerable period elapsed before I discovered one of the
causes of the uneasiness of this amiable family: it was poverty,
and they suffered that evil in a very distressing degree. Their
nourishment consisted entirely of the vegetables of their garden
and the milk of one cow, which gave very little during the winter,
when its masters could scarcely procure food to support it. They
often, I believe, suffered the pangs of hunger very poignantly,
especially the two younger cottagers, for several times they placed
food before the old man when they reserved none for themselves.
"This trait of kindness moved me sensibly. I had been accustomed,
during the night, to steal a part of their store for my own consumption,
but when I found that in doing this I inflicted pain on the cottagers,
I abstained and satisfied myself with berries, nuts, and roots which
I gathered from a neighbouring wood.
"I discovered also another means through which I was enabled to
assist their labours. I found that the youth spent a great part of
each day in collecting wood for the family fire, and during the
night I often took his tools, the use of which I quickly discovered,
and brought home firing sufficient for the consumption of several days.
"I remember, the first time that I did this, the young woman,
when she opened the door in the morning, appeared greatly
astonished on seeing a great pile of wood on the outside.
She uttered some words in a loud voice, and the youth joined her,
who also expressed surprise. I observed, with pleasure, that he
did not go to the forest that day, but spent it in repairing the
cottage and cultivating the garden.
"By degrees I made a discovery of still greater moment. I found
that these people possessed a method of communicating their
experience and feelings to one another by articulate sounds.
I perceived that the words they spoke sometimes produced pleasure or
pain, smiles or sadness,in the minds and countenances of the hearers.
This was indeed a godlike science, and I ardently desired to become
acquainted with it. But I was baffled in every attempt I made for
this purpose. Their pronunciation was quick, and the words they uttered,
not having any apparent connection with visible objects, I was unable
to discover any clue by which I could unravel the mystery of their reference.
By great application, however, and after having remained during the space
of several revolutions of the moon in my hovel, I discovered the names that
were given to some of the most familiar objects of discourse; I learned and
applied the words, `fire,' `milk,' `bread,' and `wood.' I learned also the
names of the cottagers themselves. The youth and his companion had each
of them several names, but the old man had only one, which was `father.'
The girl was called `sister' or `Agatha,' and the youth `Felix,' `brother,'
or `son.' I cannot describe the delight I felt when I learned the ideas
appropriated to each of these sounds and was able to pronounce them.
I distinguished several other words without being able as yet to understand
or apply them, such as `good,' `dearest,' `unhappy.'
"I spent the winter in this manner. The gentle manners and beauty
of the cottagers greatly endeared them to me; when they were unhappy,
I felt depressed; when they rejoiced, I sympathized in their joys.
I saw few human beings besides them, and if any other happened to
enter the cottage, their harsh manners and rude gait only enhanced
to me the superior accomplishments of my friends. The old man,
I could perceive, often endeavoured to encourage his children,
as sometimes I found that he called them, to cast off their melancholy.
He would talk in a cheerful accent, with an expression of goodness
that bestowed pleasure even upon me. Agatha listened with respect,
her eyes sometimes filled with tears, which she endeavoured to wipe away
unperceived; but I generally found that her countenance and tone were
more cheerful after having listened to the exhortations of her father.
It was not thus with Felix. He was always the saddest of the group,
and even to my unpractised senses, he appeared to have suffered more
deeply than his friends. But if his countenance was more sorrowful,
his voice was more cheerful than that of his sister, especially when
he addressed the old man.
"I could mention innumerable instances which, although slight,
marked the dispositions of these amiable cottagers. In the midst
of poverty and want, Felix carried with pleasure to his sister the
first little white flower that peeped out from beneath the snowy ground.
Early in the morning, before she had risen, he cleared away the snow
that obstructed her path to the milk-house, drew water from the well,
and brought the wood from the outhouse, where, to his perpetual astonishment,
he found his store always replenished by an invisible hand. In the day,
I believe, he worked sometimes for a neighbouring farmer, because he often
went forth and did not return until dinner, yet brought no wood with him.
At other times he worked in the garden, but as there was little to do
in the frosty season, he read to the old man and Agatha.
"This reading had puzzled me extremely at first, but by degrees I
discovered that he uttered many of the same sounds when he read as
when he talked. I conjectured, therefore, that he found on the
paper signs for speech which he understood, and I ardently
longed to comprehend these also; but how was that possible when I
did not even understand the sounds for which they stood as signs?
I improved, however, sensibly in this science, but not
sufficiently to follow up any kind of conversation, although I
applied my whole mind to the endeavour, for I easily perceived that,
although I eagerly longed to discover myself to the cottagers,
I ought not to make the attempt until I had first become master
of their language, which knowledge might enable me to make them
overlook the deformity of my figure, for with this also the
contrast perpetually presented to my eyes had made me acquainted.
"I had admired the perfect forms of my cottagers--their grace,
beauty, and delicate complexions; but how was I terrified when I
viewed myself in a transparent pool! At first I started back,
unable to believe that it was indeed I who was reflected in the
mirror; and when I became fully convinced that I was in reality the
monster that I am, I was filled with the bitterest sensations of
despondence and mortification. Alas! I did not yet entirely know
the fatal effects of this miserable deformity.
"As the sun became warmer and the light of day longer, the
snow vanished, and I beheld the bare trees and the black earth.
From this time Felix was more employed, and the heart-moving
indications of impending famine disappeared. Their food, as I
afterwards found, was coarse, but it was wholesome; and they
procured a sufficiency of it. Several new kinds of plants sprang
up in the garden, which they dressed; and these signs of comfort
increased daily as the season advanced.
"The old man, leaning on his son, walked each day at noon, when it
did not rain, as I found it was called when the heavens poured
forth its waters. This frequently took place, but a high wind
quickly dried the earth, and the season became far more pleasant
than it had been.
"My mode of life in my hovel was uniform. During the morning
I attended the motions of the cottagers, and when they were
dispersed in various occupations, I slept; the remainder of the day
was spent in observing my friends. When they had retired to rest,
if there was any moon or the night was star-light, I went into
the woods and collected my own food and fuel for the cottage.
When I returned, as often as it was necessary, I cleared their path
from the snow and performed those offices that I had seen done by Felix.
I afterwards found that these labours, performed by an invisible hand,
greatly astonished them; and once or twice I heard them, on these occasions,
utter the words `good spirit,' `wonderful'; but I did not then understand
the signification of these terms.
"My thoughts now became more active, and I longed to discover the
motives and feelings of these lovely creatures; I was inquisitive
to know why Felix appeared so miserable and Agatha so sad.
I thought (foolish wretch!) that it might be in my power to restore
happiness to these deserving people. When I slept or was absent,
the forms of the venerable blind father, the gentle Agatha, and the
excellent Felix flitted before me. I looked upon them as superior
beings who would be the arbiters of my future destiny. I formed in
my imagination a thousand pictures of presenting myself to them,
and their reception of me. I imagined that they would be disgusted,
until, by my gentle demeanour and onciliating words, I should first
win their favour and afterwards their love.
"These thoughts exhilarated me and led me to apply with fresh ardour
to the acquiring the art of language. My organs were indeed harsh,
but supple; and although my voice was very unlike the soft music of their
tones, yet I pronounced such words as I understood with tolerable ease.
It was as the ass and the lap-dog; yet surely the gentle ass whose
intentions were affectionate, although his manners were rude,
deserved better treatment than blows and execration.
"The pleasant showers and genial warmth of spring greatly altered
the aspect of the earth. Men who before this change seemed to have
been hid in caves dispersed themselves and were employed in various
arts of cultivation. The birds sang in more cheerful notes, and
the leaves began to bud forth on the trees. Happy, happy earth!
Fit habitation for gods, which, so short a time before, was bleak,
damp, and unwholesome. My spirits were elevated by the enchanting
appearance of nature; the past was blotted from my memory, the present
was tranquil, and the future gilded by bright rays of hope and
anticipations of joy."